Golden ringlets. A contagious grin. Eyes that sparkled with mischief and creativity. Abundant energy. A gift for connecting with others from varied backgrounds. A passion for leading people in worshipping Jesus. Rhythm in her bones. A heart for the nations.
I don't understand Lord, why it is that the young woman this barely begins to describe is no longer with us. How it is that you did not prevent her car from sliding off the icy Colorado road leading to her death early Saturday morning? It hurts to even get an inkling of the torment, grief and incredulity which must be barraging her beloved parents, siblings, and friends. Or to consider their desperate desire to rewind the tape of time, or to awaken to learn that this news was merely a cruel nightmare.
I haven't seen Abby in years, but have sweet memories of having she and her older sister Ruth as preschoolers over to bake cinnamon rolls, play dress up, or just goof around. I was like their older sister/ babysitter. Since moving away, I've enjoyed hearing of their growth, opportunities, and had recently reconnected via facebook.
On hearing this news, I feel mute and helpless, knowing no words, or Hallmark cards can lift the grief her family is bearing. The suddenness and untimeliness of her death, pricks a panic within me as I consider the very real possibility of those dearest to me in this world leaving it as suddenly. I know that prayer alone will be able to get them through this, and to restore their hope that joy in daily life will one day be present again.
God, give them a tangible conception of what it is like for Abigail, right now, in glory. May Donna see her precious little ones, gone on before, welcoming their sister into the presence of Jesus. May all morbid considerations, or relentless what if/ if only's be peacefully laid to rest, and not be a source of torment. May many who don't know you, hunger for the passion and life of Christ that they experienced in Abby, and surrender their lives to You.
Bring beauty from ashes, Dear Lord. We look to you.
1 comment:
What sweet words, Julia. What an appropriate prayer. Thank you for sharing that.
I had become quite close to Abby in the last 3 years. We met regularly at my house and she called me her mentor, though I hardly felt like that. She taught me more than I ever taught her. I loved her like a sister and my grief has truly overwhelmed me. I have never lost anyone this close to me before. I ache so for her family.
Today I struggled with a sort of numb rage; not rage at God, but rage that she has to be gone from my life, that I will never see her or hug her or hear her sweet voice again. I have been feeling a bit distant from God lately, and Abby always challenged me to pursue Him. Now in her death I'm trying to find my way back, and I'm struggling. I don't feel the peace that passes all understanding that I keep praying for, for me and everyone else. I just feel empty and sad.
Mikayla is crying for me. I need to go. I love you, dear friend.
Julie
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